Sundaypost⎟L´appel du Vide ⎟Am I insane?!

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Hey internet! 

Are you all enjoying your weekend? What have you been doing yesterday and today? 

Since I was sick Thurday and Friday, I had 4 days off - but weekend was still way too fast!

So, I didn´t do anything special today. We - I and my family - went hiking in the Harz Mountains.  

It was nice, but I am afraid of heights, so I wasn´t really able to fully enjoy the hike on a small path with nothing seperating and protecting me from the steep and rocky slopes on the right and left of me. 

Anyways, we went to see the famous "Roßtrappe", which is a dent in a rock, shaped like a hoof. 

the "Roßtrappe"

The legend:

"A giant, named Bodo, once followed the King´s beautiful daughter Brunhilde, whom he wanted to marry against her will. Brunhilde fled on a white stallion, but her horse stopped in front of a deep ravine. She, scared of Bodo, made her horse leap in one bound to the rocks on the other side. Her pursuer tried to follow her, but didn´t make it, so he and his horse fell into the dephts below. The Impression of the horse´s hoof may still be seen today. The giant bodo gave his name to the small river, the Bode." (Wikipedia, Roßtrappe)

Brunhilde escaping and Bodo falling into the depths. 

That is pretty interesting, isn´t it? But that´s not what I wanted to talkt to you about. 

I told you I am afraid of heights. So today, when I was standing on one of those fenced "platforms", clinging to the fence while mesmerized starring into the dephts below me, I suddenly had that weird and unexplainable urge to jump off the rocks. Don´t get me wrong; I was not having suicidal thoughts, really. It was just a tiny little voice in my head telling me to leap off into the depths and it felt like some invisible powers were trying to pull me closer and closer to the ravine. 

my view at that moment 

Sounds freaky, I know, but I did some research and actually found an explanation and even a name for it: l´appel du vide. It is a french term (translates into "The Call of the Void"), used to describe a genuine, human feeling to make an impulsive move that will, quite frankly, kill you.
In other words, when you, for example, stand on top of a tall building, looking down and suddenly you feel the urge to throw yourself off. Or when you are driving and see a car coming at you from the other side of the street and that tiny voice tells you to jerk the steering wheel to the left.
According to a study on "high place phenomenon"  published in the Journal of Affective Disorders, researchers from Florida State University´s psychology department 431 undergraduate college students, who had to complete online measures of lifetime frequency of experiencing the HPP, suicidal ideation, anxiety sensitivity, depressive symptoms, and history of mood episodes. 

In most cases the urge to jump had nothing to do with a "death wish" (Freud) or any suicidal thoughts they might have had in the past. It is actually quite the opposite. The researchers even think that "the urge to jump affirms the urge to live." Such neurotic impulses may explain many crimes, such as stealing or killing or suicides. 

To make the thought process/ impulse process a little more understandible, I found a very good somewhat speculative scenario: "Imagine a person with high anxiety sensitivity. She leans over a ledge of the Grand Canyon. In super fast reaction to her physical sensation of anxiety - physical effects are faster heart beat and shortness of breath - , her survival instinct forces her away from the edge. Yet when she looks at the ledge, she sees it´s sturdy. There was never any danger. Her brain tries to process an answer to the question `Why did I back up if it was save?´ A logical answer is that she must have been tempted to jump."

I think this is very interesting! I have had the urge to jump off a tall building, a cliff or a bridge a lot and I´ve always been scared of it. I thought I was insane. But now I know that there is an explanation for it and that nearly everyone has it at least once in his life. 

There is a really funny YouTube video from my favorite YouTuber Dan Howell (aka danisnotonfire), called "PSYCHO THOUGHTS" (klick on the title to watch it, and subscribe to his channel!:D). But he explains it well. 

He talks about this complicated power we seem to have forgotten we possess. He says: "You realize in that moment that you have power over life and death." That is so accurate. 

I hope you enjoyed this post and found it interesting! Maybe you´ve had that urge before and wondered what was wrong with you. Well, I can assure you, that nothing is wrong with you! Nothing at all.

So, have you ever felt the urge to jump off a tall building or anything like that? Tell me in the comments below! That would be very interesting! 

Have a really nice rest of the day and a good start of the week tomorrow! 

Lots of love,

Anika 

 

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